Thursday, March 5, 2009

Mar. 05

Mar. 05
Originally uploaded by Cancer Boy
Didn't take the Kytril today. Figured I'd rather risk nausea, than another day of drowsiness. That was about 90% good idea. A couple of times where I felt my throat seize up as though in anticipation, but at least I had a clear(er?) head.

Got some work done, but not enough. I need to somehow make up for the days I lose to chemo, but I just have no fucking clue how. It's frustrating, trying to continue saying "I'm a real boy!" all Pinocchio-like, and trying to contend with everything else, but I think it would be even more frustrating, to fully withdraw.

I had dinner with Melissa, and then we saw a student production of The Vagina Monologues at the University. Need some more time to process that. In the meantime, feel free to call me patriarchal for not fully appreciating it.

It's nice and warm outside. Fuck, I missed not freezing.

Addendum: I just discovered the best typo ever. In an email with a student, I meant to say "...cancel with you." Instead, I said "...cancer with you". Hmm. Wonder what's on my mind.


Holly said...

honey bun...there IS no making up the days we lose to chemo...let go, breathe, lay on the floor if you need to...but just be gentle with yourself.. i am constantly shocked at how much you expect yourself to accomplish....

Elyse said...

You do expect very much of yourself. It's amazing how often I still see you around the office.

I wanted to pet your hair today before the meeting... the Mohawk just makes me want to touch it.

Armand said...

Holly: I tried laying on the floor for a while, but then I started thinking about all the stuff I should be doing, that's not getting done. I don't shut off. Ever. Go me!

Elyse: It's getting past the "freshly shorn farm animal" stage, and heading right into "marmot" territory.

Corrine said...

hahah perhaps I'm a bit patriarchal myself, I'm conflicted with that production.

But I'm the type of person who doesn't really believe in women studies! I want to learn history for example in a way that everyone's stories are relevant and are given consideration. There is way too much compartmentalization in academia and I feel that it takes away from understanding the bigger picture.

I think the Vagina Monologues is the same sort of thing.

Armand said...

Corrine: I balance the ambivalence with the thought that if nothing else, it raises funds and awareness for some rather important causes.